Cover my eyes and count to ten
The reality is the same.

No matter how I spin this aftermath.

My child is gone
The Disconnect remains
My head and my heart refuse to speak
And painful longing fills the void.

As I sit
Questioning my own reality
Did she even exist?

How can she be gone?


I feel judged that I have not accepted this loss
And “moved on”/”forward” – whatever euphemism for “healing”

My brain knows she’s gone
My heart just – so – too much.

Just too much to bear.

And I want no one to experience their child’s death –

It is truly undefinable.


Published by Kate B

I am trying to integrate my loss with life...

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: